Posted by Anne Elliot in 
I don’t know if you have read the Twilight series but, I can almost guarantee you know a teenage girl that has. It’s a sensation. It’s has become an iconic novel of teenage love that little girls everywhere are hoping to emulate.
Here’s what you don’t know if you haven’t read this series—it sends a seriously screwed up message to teenage girls. Bella, the main character, is a dysfunctional teenage girl with no self esteem and a thing for the most inappropriate boyfriend she could find. I think one of the worst moments in this series comes when she says that this man is the reason for her coming to town to live- no mention of her dad or her mom- just him.
Edward is 108 years old— enough to be her dead great-grandfather— what does he see in a seventeen year old girl? Ewwwww! He stalks her, hangs out in her bedroom at night and when he isn’t doing that he’s out in the forest killing animals and drinking the blood. This is all billed as being romantic. It starts in the first book and gets more and more dysfunctional from there. By the forth book is just plain weird.
Edward is a shallow controlling KILLER. Bella needs therapy.
We need to read the books our daughters (or in my case nieces) are reading and then discuss. This is the perfect opportunity to discuss bounderies with boys-self respect-expectations and goals.
I think that the book deals with some pretty typical teenage issues through the lens of fantasy. This particular teenager finds a soulmate that’s an “old soul” who helps her overcome her issues with loneliness and self esteem.
The idea of vampirism is especially romantic because its magical and tragic at the same time, especially when they did not ask to become one. The age of the vampire never matters – and lets be honest that’s probably pretty realistic given that women will marry men who are actually 30 years their senior in regular real life where those men look 80. The age difference in twilight is even less severe than most – one of my favorite vampire novels has over 300 years between the protagonists.
Edward doesn’t seem shallow or controlling, and the fact that he eats his animals raw as opposed to cooking them doesn’t really make all that much of a difference.
I mean, I feel like my explanation here is just silly. I think you are being too serious about something that’s meant to be fantasy. Vampires are a literary device – a way to build conflict, pity, desperation and awe on the part of the leading lady. It worked in “The Vampire Diaries” and it worked in the “Silver Kiss” and “Interview with a Vampire.”
I think the message it sends is just fine as long as girls keep it within the context of a fantasy story like Harry Potter and “A Wrinkle in TIme.” And I also think there is something beautiful about sacrificing for the one you love – becoming a vampire is quite a sacrifice.
At any rate – I find it highly interesting that there is a twilight ad on your blog. Now that sends the wrong message. Heh.
First, I need to say that I liked the books, but I was disturbed by Bella’s character.
I think the message about relationships is a little “murky”.
Bella is a young girl with low self-esteem, who throughout the book talks about how unworthy she is of this boy’s love, how “plain and ordinary” she is, how BEAUTIFUL he is, and how she doesn’t deserve him or want to live without him.
I agree with your last reader…like it or not, these are real issues in the teenage community and there are many girls who feel this way and are in these types of relationships. The problem is that the romantic relationships in the book don’t come off as fantasy and the Vampires in Twilight are a little too normal and real. Most girls I fear, don’t see this like a Harry Potter story. They see it like a fairy tale, waiting for their Edward.
Alarming, as the mother of 10 and 13 year old girls.
But that being said, my daughters and I read the books together and I used them them as a springboard to open the door to discuss these issues. The girls read the books, and understand that the FIRST person you have to love is yourself and now laugh at the lunacy (no pun intended), of wanting to die or end your existence over a boy.
Parents must take responsibility and read what our children read, listen to the music they listen to (no matter how awful we feel it is) and listen to what they are discussing, texting and sharing with their friends so we can have real conversations. Otherwise, your letting Stephenie Meyer (and everyone else) set the standard for appropriate behavior for our children.
I definitely agree with Staci about parental responsibility. I guess as a 27-year-old the idea of a girl seeing this book as reality was a little bit far-fetched, but perhaps I’m just out of touch with the tweens, being so much older.
I think it’s important to know what your children are reading and be ready to discuss the issues with them. I remember being 17 and breaking up with my first boyfriend and feeling like the world was going to end. I remember struggling with the issue of self esteem and not feeling pretty enough or perfect enough to even have a relationship at all. I guess I identify with Bella because that’s how some of my teenage years felt too.
But, with maturity came clarity, many relationships and finally a sense of self and a wonderful husband.
When I was about 12 years old, I read a book called “The Wind Blows Backwards.” It was youth fiction and dealt with a girl who fell in love with the school jock only to find out that he was obsessed with ideas of his father’s suicide and even suicidal himself. She was “mousey” and plain, and she felt unworthy of him. Talk about too real – at the end of the story he attempts to kill himself and the end of the story is about her nursing him back to health in their first semester of college. I think young people can handle a lot more complex and disturbing ideas than we give them credit for.
Anyway, very provocative post and responses!
Do you guys remember what it’s like to be a teenager? self-esteem issues and all.
What you might forget from this period in your life is the emulation of those icons of teenage life. I’m not saying that teenagers will think it’s reality just that it’s message is weak. Boyfriends are not the point of our lives- the opposite sex’s attention does not determine self-worth and being attracted to men who are a threat to your very existence is fundamentally wrong.
One of the things I remember most from my high school years is reading everything that was within arms reach- WITHOUT any parental input. So when my sisters, nieces and I read this series it rang a bell with me.
First, I wanted to talk about the kind of person Bella portrays. Second, I wanted to talk about relationship boundaries with boys. Third, having your own identity.
We have done all of that- I’m not saying that teenagers shouldn’t read the books-just that any pop culture fad should be vetted by parents.
BTW- we don’t get to choose what ads are served on our site- but thanks for noticing them!
Thanks guys for taking the time to discuss!
Jodi, this is a hilarious piece. Really, I thought the books were good. But not as good as Sookie Stackhouse. But I think Stephanie Meyer made the main characters too… fictional. They need to be a little more realistic. Take Bella for example, she acts like she can’t do anything without Edward… but she can. And that just gets worse in the second book, “New Moon”. But other than her lack in realistic characters… Stepahnie Meyer wrote a good book.
I’m reading the series for the second time right now – the first time was hot off the presses – before the ‘cult’ began! I liked the writing, thought the characters shallow, and determined that it was a good ‘beach read.’
And then I began to understand how many teenage girls (I work with Middle Schoolers – alot of them!) are completely fascinated with the Cullens! And, how many of their parents are completely in the dark about the subject matter in the books. (Two weeks ago, I had a 12 year old ask me why Edward would hurt Bella while they are on their honeymoon! – Hence my reasoning behind the second read – different perspective, different motive!)
Middle School girls have extreme confidence issues – all the time! The last message they need to hear is how inadequate they are without a perfect boy to commit to!
The stories are entertaining, as I said before, but parents really need to know what their kids are reading!
Edward Cullen can stalk me….I’m cool with it.